feelings

My counselor says I don't spend time with my feelings. I'm quick to put up a wall to anything painful. I know this. It's my coping mechanism. I have left too many homes, too many friends, too many loved ones to allow myself to feel the pain that comes with saying good-bye. If I keep looking toward the future and exciting things around the corner I don't have to remember the past.

Where are you, feelings?

I have been trying to spend time alone exploring that uncharted territory but not much is found. My heart is not my own to conquer. It has its own bonds with another outside of myself. When I am carefully focused on the present task at hand something pulls on those strings.
I'm attached.

If I cannot feel the warmth, or pain, or longing of my own heart it is another heart that calls to mine. I can feel the warmth and pain and longing of that heart thousands of miles away.
Soul connection.

I don't understand it...logic can't explain it...with each tug that soul makes on mine...my heart's door is inched open bit by bit. Come out, feelings. Break out and see...